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Reblogged from topitmunkeydog
ducktapeduck:

topitmunkeydog:

alltehfandoms:

firefly-and-fae:

topitmunkeydog:

i killed a man
photo courtesy of koodalinee

That’s a sticky situation you seem to find yourself in, friend.

DAMNIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING CONFESSING TO YOUR CRIME ON THE INTERNET?!
Here’s what you need to do.
Wash the knife in bleach and throw it in a sewer grate across town or a large local body of water.
Smash the teeth out of the head and collect them all, then grind the teeth into dust (IN A DIFFERENT LOCATION THAN WHERE YOU STAY) and dispose of them.
Cut off the fingers and strip the flesh from the bone. Feed the flesh to an animal or go all Hannibal on it and consume it yourself.
Now comes the tricky part.
You’re going to want to get a hold of a ridiculous amount of saran wrap, a large plastic sheet, some garbage bags, a power tool that can dismember a body (pay in cash and buy it from a store outside of your city/town), a change of clothes, and a metric fuck-ton of cleaning supplies.
Got it all? Good.
Roll the body on top of the plastic sheet and dismember it. (You’re going to want to do this in a fairly clear, easy to clean area), blood will spurt out of that body insanely so you better have a good stomach.  
After you’ve got all the pieces nice and transportable, wrap them up in the saran wrap and stuff them in the garbage bags along with the clothes you were wearing when you murdered the victim and dismembered them.
Now, drive to the nearest auto salvage yard and throw the body and the clothes you’re wearing) in the trunk on top of a spare tire or any nearby one you can find, throw a heavy fuelant on top (either a hefty amount of gasoline or some napalm [gasoline mixed evenly with cat litter or orange juice concentrate]). Punch out a tail light, ignite the body, close the trunk, and get home.
Clean…
Clean so much.
Scrub until you can’t anymore and then fucking do it more. If you think you’re being too careful, you’re not.
Finally find a GROUP of friends (people who understand your murderous tendencies), and form a solid alibi and stick to it…
Oh, and delete your tumblr.

I killed a blueberry

they are either a writer or a murderer 

ducktapeduck:

topitmunkeydog:

alltehfandoms:

firefly-and-fae:

topitmunkeydog:

i killed a man

photo courtesy of koodalinee

That’s a sticky situation you seem to find yourself in, friend.

DAMNIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING CONFESSING TO YOUR CRIME ON THE INTERNET?!

Here’s what you need to do.

Wash the knife in bleach and throw it in a sewer grate across town or a large local body of water.

Smash the teeth out of the head and collect them all, then grind the teeth into dust (IN A DIFFERENT LOCATION THAN WHERE YOU STAY) and dispose of them.

Cut off the fingers and strip the flesh from the bone. Feed the flesh to an animal or go all Hannibal on it and consume it yourself.

Now comes the tricky part.

You’re going to want to get a hold of a ridiculous amount of saran wrap, a large plastic sheet, some garbage bags, a power tool that can dismember a body (pay in cash and buy it from a store outside of your city/town), a change of clothes, and a metric fuck-ton of cleaning supplies.

Got it all? Good.

Roll the body on top of the plastic sheet and dismember it. (You’re going to want to do this in a fairly clear, easy to clean area), blood will spurt out of that body insanely so you better have a good stomach.  

After you’ve got all the pieces nice and transportable, wrap them up in the saran wrap and stuff them in the garbage bags along with the clothes you were wearing when you murdered the victim and dismembered them.

Now, drive to the nearest auto salvage yard and throw the body and the clothes you’re wearing) in the trunk on top of a spare tire or any nearby one you can find, throw a heavy fuelant on top (either a hefty amount of gasoline or some napalm [gasoline mixed evenly with cat litter or orange juice concentrate]). Punch out a tail light, ignite the body, close the trunk, and get home.

Clean…

Clean so much.

Scrub until you can’t anymore and then fucking do it more. If you think you’re being too careful, you’re not.

Finally find a GROUP of friends (people who understand your murderous tendencies), and form a solid alibi and stick to it…

Oh, and delete your tumblr.

I killed a blueberry

they are either a writer or a murderer 

(via adancingcrocodileisbehindyou)

Reblogged from nue-deactivated20130114

staff:

rustandlead:

fearlesslarry:

koishy:

can we just talk about how this always ends up happening somehow

I end up with 10+ tabs all the time

i end up with so many that they don’t even say tumblr they are just little squares.

image

Reblogged from belcanta
tank-grrl:

hello-missmayhem:

cptprocrastination:

doomhamster:

belcanta:

nikkidubs:

attentiondeficitaptitude:

belcanta:

Guaranteed basic income to every citizen, whether or not they are employed to ensure their survival and that they live in a dignified, humane way, preventing poverty, illness, homelessness, reducing crime, encouraging higher education and learning vocations as well as helping society become more prosperous as a whole. 

Wow. Forget raising the minimum wage. This is much much better idea.
The minimum wage could actually drop if we had basic income.
But Americans would never go for it. Miserably slogging through 12 hour days and having businesses open 24/7 is too engrained in our culture.

"BUT WHERE WILL THE GOVERNMENT GET THE MONEY?" screamed Joe Schmoe, slamming a meaty fist onto the table and getting mouth-froth all over the front of his greying tank top. "You libt*rds all think money grows on TREES!! HAHA!""But where will people get the incentive to work?!" Mindy Bindy cried, flapping her hands in front of her face. She’d had a fear of the unemployed lollygagging about ever since she was a child and her mother told her to be afraid of the unemployed lollygagging about. "You think people should get paid for nothing? I work hard for my money!”
"But who will serve me?" grumbled Marty McMoneybags. "Who will make me feel important? Who will do my laundry and cook my food and stand in front of me wearing a plastic smile while I take out all my stress—because I do have a lot of stress, you know, being this rich is stressful—on them?” He paused and straightened out the piles of hundred dollar bills on the desk in front of him, then raised his two watery, outraged eyes up to the Heavens. “Lord, if there are no poor people, how will I know that I’m rich??”

I laughed. This is perfect! Well said!

The thing is, while I’m sure you could scrape up a few people who’d be willing to just float by on a guaranteed minimum income? For most people the choice to work would be a no-brainer. “Hmmm. I can get by on 33k a year, or I can take that part time job and make 48k… enough to move to a better apartment, maybe take the family on vacation. Sold.” Hell, most people would want to work simply because it gives one a sense of dignity and something to do with one’s time. (Speaking as someone who’s been unemployed, on extended sick leave, etc. in her time, the boredom and sense of isolation that comes with not having a job is almost as bad as the humiliation of having to depend on other people for one’s survival.)
And with this system, part-time jobs and “non-skilled” jobs would be much more readily available because nobody would need to work two or three jobs just to stay afloat!
Which would ALSO mean that employers and customers couldn’t shamelessly exploit employees the way they can today, because if losing a job weren’t necessarily a financial disaster, more people would be willing to walk out on jobs where they weren’t being treated with dignity.
And if this also applies to students (and it should) then student loans would become much less of a problem, and fewer people would flunk out of school because of having to juggle studies and work.
Far fewer people would be forced to stay with abusive partners, parents or roommates because they couldn’t afford to move out.
And the thing is, all those people who suddenly had money? They’d be spending it. They’d be getting all the stuff they can’t afford now - new clothes, books, toys, locally-produced food, car repairs - and with each purchase money would flow BACK to the government, because VAT, also income tax.
The unemployed and/or disabled wouldn’t need special support any more - which would also mean the government could fire however many admins who are currently engaged in humiliating - *cough* making sure those people aren’t getting money they don’t deserve. Same for medical benefits and pensions. And I’m no legal scholar, but I somehow imagine less financial desperation would lead to less petty crime, and hence less need for police and security everywhere?
TL;DR Doomie thinks this is a good idea, laughs at those who protest.

reblogging for more top commentary

They tried something like this out in Canada as a sort of social experiment, called Mincome. What they found was that, on the whole, people continued to work about as much as they did before. Only new mothers and teenagers worked substantially less hours. 
But wait, there’s more. Because parents were spending just a little more time at home and involved with their families, test scores increased. Because teens didn’t have to work to support their families, drop-out rates decreased. Crime rates, hospital visits, psychiatric hospitalizations and domestic abuse rates all dropped, as well. More adults pursued higher education. Those who continued to work reported more job flexibility and more opportunity to choose employment they preferred.
Basically, now you can go prove to your asshole family members that society won’t collapse without poor people for you to feel better than.

The picture is awesome, but read the commentary, that’s what I’m reblogging for.

tank-grrl:

hello-missmayhem:

cptprocrastination:

doomhamster:

belcanta:

nikkidubs:

attentiondeficitaptitude:

belcanta:

Guaranteed basic income to every citizen, whether or not they are employed to ensure their survival and that they live in a dignified, humane way, preventing poverty, illness, homelessness, reducing crime, encouraging higher education and learning vocations as well as helping society become more prosperous as a whole. 

Wow. Forget raising the minimum wage. This is much much better idea.

The minimum wage could actually drop if we had basic income.

But Americans would never go for it. Miserably slogging through 12 hour days and having businesses open 24/7 is too engrained in our culture.

"BUT WHERE WILL THE GOVERNMENT GET THE MONEY?" screamed Joe Schmoe, slamming a meaty fist onto the table and getting mouth-froth all over the front of his greying tank top. "You libt*rds all think money grows on TREES!! HAHA!"

"But where will people get the incentive to work?!" Mindy Bindy cried, flapping her hands in front of her face. She’d had a fear of the unemployed lollygagging about ever since she was a child and her mother told her to be afraid of the unemployed lollygagging about. "You think people should get paid for nothing? I work hard for my money!”

"But who will serve me?" grumbled Marty McMoneybags. "Who will make me feel important? Who will do my laundry and cook my food and stand in front of me wearing a plastic smile while I take out all my stress—because I do have a lot of stress, you know, being this rich is stressful—on them?” He paused and straightened out the piles of hundred dollar bills on the desk in front of him, then raised his two watery, outraged eyes up to the Heavens. “Lord, if there are no poor people, how will I know that I’m rich??”

I laughed. This is perfect! Well said!

The thing is, while I’m sure you could scrape up a few people who’d be willing to just float by on a guaranteed minimum income? For most people the choice to work would be a no-brainer. “Hmmm. I can get by on 33k a year, or I can take that part time job and make 48k… enough to move to a better apartment, maybe take the family on vacation. Sold.” Hell, most people would want to work simply because it gives one a sense of dignity and something to do with one’s time. (Speaking as someone who’s been unemployed, on extended sick leave, etc. in her time, the boredom and sense of isolation that comes with not having a job is almost as bad as the humiliation of having to depend on other people for one’s survival.)

And with this system, part-time jobs and “non-skilled” jobs would be much more readily available because nobody would need to work two or three jobs just to stay afloat!

Which would ALSO mean that employers and customers couldn’t shamelessly exploit employees the way they can today, because if losing a job weren’t necessarily a financial disaster, more people would be willing to walk out on jobs where they weren’t being treated with dignity.

And if this also applies to students (and it should) then student loans would become much less of a problem, and fewer people would flunk out of school because of having to juggle studies and work.

Far fewer people would be forced to stay with abusive partners, parents or roommates because they couldn’t afford to move out.

And the thing is, all those people who suddenly had money? They’d be spending it. They’d be getting all the stuff they can’t afford now - new clothes, books, toys, locally-produced food, car repairs - and with each purchase money would flow BACK to the government, because VAT, also income tax.

The unemployed and/or disabled wouldn’t need special support any more - which would also mean the government could fire however many admins who are currently engaged in humiliating - *cough* making sure those people aren’t getting money they don’t deserve. Same for medical benefits and pensions. And I’m no legal scholar, but I somehow imagine less financial desperation would lead to less petty crime, and hence less need for police and security everywhere?

TL;DR Doomie thinks this is a good idea, laughs at those who protest.

reblogging for more top commentary

They tried something like this out in Canada as a sort of social experiment, called Mincome. What they found was that, on the whole, people continued to work about as much as they did before. Only new mothers and teenagers worked substantially less hours. 

But wait, there’s more. Because parents were spending just a little more time at home and involved with their families, test scores increased. Because teens didn’t have to work to support their families, drop-out rates decreased. Crime rates, hospital visits, psychiatric hospitalizations and domestic abuse rates all dropped, as well. More adults pursued higher education. Those who continued to work reported more job flexibility and more opportunity to choose employment they preferred.

Basically, now you can go prove to your asshole family members that society won’t collapse without poor people for you to feel better than.

The picture is awesome, but read the commentary, that’s what I’m reblogging for.

(via adancingcrocodileisbehindyou)

Reblogged from sizvideos
Reblogged from avengersclubx
Reblogged from the-kellin-under-the-vic

Anonymous said: omg if baby oil dissolves condoms what the fuck does it do to babies???

the-kellin-under-the-vic:

This may be shocking, but babies and condoms are made of different material

Reblogged from mattfrombusted

stiles-stilinsking:

mollyiswideawake:

the-eleventh-blog:

iwanty0ubleeders:

can you imagine

if google just disappeared from the internet 

and then we couldn’t google what happened to it

because google was gone 

image

It took me a good two minutes to work out that that is a picture of a person in a translucent waterslide and not someone trapped in a human test tube in a horror film

this is why we need google

(Source: mattfrombusted, via adancingcrocodileisbehindyou)

Reblogged from bowtais-are-cool

harblkun:

bowtais-are-cool:

bowtais-are-cool:

Hello! My baby!

image

Hello! My honey!

image

Hello! My ragtime gOOD LORD HOLY FUCKING SHIT

image

image

Oh my god

this is the most accurate representation of working in 3D I have ever seen

(via szymon-ritz)

Reblogged from oldspice

so-uncivilised:

maxeth:

what the fuck is going on

You’re right!

(Source: oldspice, via hipsterbrigadier)

Reblogged from greglastrade

VIVA LA VIE BOHEME!

(Source: greglastrade, via piietromaxiimoff)